What a month it has been. What a year! So far this could be the best start of a year I have ever had. All of the bad is melting away like the snow on the Four Peaks. Once I faced my past Horror stories and weeded through the memories and the hurt, my life started to come together. It was as though I had to heal all of the hurt and the wrong doings against my soul in order to be happy And I can honestly say I am getting happy.
I am so in love with my boyfriend Matt and he has plans for our future that I just get so giddy thinking about it. We are traveling to France in the late spring and I know something magical is going to happen when we are there. No rushing it. So I keep it to myself and enjoy the moment.
And did I mention we are going to France! Finally! I have been talking about France for years and never thought I would get to go but I said it every year and I manifested my trip in my brain. I pictured myself riding a bike with a French baguette in the basket and a bottle of Bordeaux Red Wine. Matt even jokes about my vision of how I see myself in France. It will be incredible to travel with Matt to the one place in the world that I never lost hope that I would really get to.
We bought a house, Well my love bought us A house so I would always have a place to live. I am so blessed with uncodintional love and understanding since the day Matt came back into my life. All of the hurt, the sadness, the pain melts away with his kisses and hugs. He never treats me like I’m broken. He is my rock. I fight everyday for him. For our love. If my body says to rest during the day I rest, that way when Matt is home I can stay awake and spend time with him. I am fortunate to be able to also stay at home full time and do not have to be concerned about working.
I have been able to focus on getting my life in order now that I am able to stay at home. I was able to close out a workmans comp claim and look forward to getting my settlement check In the next few weeks. I have been able to have hearings to get life in order and I am waiting on the most important hearing, my disability case will be heard by a judge and he can make the final decision on my benefits. Now that I know we are waiting for a court date I have been able to focus on Doctors and healing and preparing for my day in disability court.
I have had a nightmare of a time with my insurance company not approving any of my treatments that I have been doing for over two years now. Long story short that will involve a day in DES and another hearing with a judge to listen to my reasoning as to why I need to have so many celiac plexus blocks and genicular nerve blocks. Until then, I have to wait it out and eat soft food and live on zophran.
Life definitely isn’t easy yet. And my illness is still there. But my brain is happier and my smile is back. It feels good to be in a place of happiness. I just need my body to feel better so I can enjoy our new home and the resort area we live in.
Thanks for catching up with me And listening to my story. I appreciate it.